July 31, 2006
Worst Travel Souvenir Ever?
There are souvenirs, and there are souvenirs. Some people want an ancient tribal mask from an obscure area in Ghana, others want a commemorative plate depicting all the local tourist attractions of, say, Philadelphia. But almost no one wants this. (Do they? Please tell me they don’t.)
In the Eiffel Tower gift shop I saw this lovely, er, candle, I guess it was. It was a miniature Eiffel Tower trinket, sunk into what looked like some sort of gelatinous goo with a “Vive La France” kind of red, white and blue fade. It also had a wick on top, and the whole thing was housed in a … souvenir glass? It was really just kind of confusing.
Jack Handey once wrote:
“Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he’s carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he’s carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you’re drunk.”
That’s kind of how I feel about this candle/figurine/flag/goo/commemorative shot glass. Another feeling it brings up is one of relief — relief that Americans aren’t the only ones who make tacky crap.
And to think, they were only charging 13 euros…
July 26, 2006
5 Reasons to Go to St. Louis, MO
1. City Museum- 701 North 15th Street – (314) 231-CITY This over-the-top kids’ museum is cool, artsy and a great addition to a revitalized downtown. Located in a former International Shoe Company, the museum was built from a hodgepodge of materials salvaged from around the city for a magical, mosaical effect that’s a visual treat for adults, too. Visit their website for a peek at my new favorite place in the whole city.
2. Ted Drewes – 6726 Chippewa
This iconic Rt. 66 stand has been serving frozen custard since the 1940s, so it’s no surprise that it’s nothing short of a hallowed summer tradition. And how is frozen custard different from ice cream or fro-yo? The recipe adds eggs to cream and sugar for a texture that’s smoother than ice cream and richer than yogurt. Don’t let the lines scare you; that’s just part of the deal.
3. The Hill
This neighborhood is predominantly Italian-American, and you know what that means: tons of great Italian food. Toasted ravioli was invented there (toasted = fried) and even though you can get it at the Olive Garden now — well, I’m assuming you don’t need me to tell you why this would be better.
4. Free Stuff!
There’s plenty of fun to be had for the income-impaired, as many of St. Louis’ cultural offerings can be had for the low, low price of free. Enjoy not paying admission at the St. Louis Zoo, St. Louis Art Museum, St. Louis Science Center and the MUNY, an outdoor musical theater in Forest Park where 1,500 of the 9,000 outdoor seats are free. For a complete list of free things, click here.
5. The New Busch Stadium
Whether or not you’re a fan of baseball, going to the right ballpark can help you understand what all the fuss is about. Shiny and new, but designed in the style of old-timey ballparks, the new Busch Stadium saw its inaugural game on April 10, 2006, and has been winning over fans ever since. (I can almost smell the roasting peanuts as I write).
What’s your favorite thing to do in St. Louis? Add your tip in the comments section!
July 21, 2006
Strange Statues Around the World
You know when you’re on vacation and you see a bronze person with their head submerged in a brick wall, or a cement troll under a bridge, or some other thing that defies logic, gravity and potentially even good taste?
Luckily, someone has taken the trouble to catalog them so that we don’t have to! Check out this page entitled Strange Statues of the World to see what kooky sculptors around the world are doing to keep their streets more interesting.
July 17, 2006
Things to do in Sausalito
Earlier this year, I applied to be in the Lonely Planet writer’s pool, and for my application I wrote about Sausalito. Here, for your leisure-time pleasure are some excerpts for what to do there. (By the way, my application was accepted and I’m now in the writer’s pool — although I’m still wading somewhere in the shallow end).
Bay Model (tel 415-332-3871; www.spn.usace.army.mil/bmvc; 2100 Bridgeway Ave; open 9am-4pm Tues-Sat; summer hours 9am-4pm Tues-Fri and 10am-5pm Sat-Sun; admission free)
Take the entire Bay Area and shrink it down to fit onto two football fields and you’ve got the Bay Model, a three-dimensional hydraulic model built to simulate tides and currents for the edification of the Corps of Engineers. You might learn just a little more than you want to know about tidal patterns and brackish water, but science types can geek out to their heart’s content.
Bay Area Discovery Museum (tel 415-339-3900; www.baykidsmuseum.org; 557 McReynolds Road; open 9am-4pm Tues-Fri and 10am-5pm Sat-Sun; adult/child $8.50/$7.50)
Located in a cluster of retired military buildings, this isn’t one of those children’s museums that adults love, too. It’s a little like watching a toddler playing in a cardboard box: the appeal isn’t immediately obvious, but you’re glad they’re having fun.
Sausalito Ferry
The cheapest boat ride in town is the Golden Gate Ferry (tel 415-455-2000; www.goldengateferry.org; $6.45 each way). Enjoy the view of Sausalito trickling down the hill from Highway 1 (particularly enchanting at dusk) as well as a hit-parade of views that includes the Golden Gate Bridge, Alcatraz and the San Francisco skyline.
Hiking
Right on the water and ensconced in eucalyptus trees, decommissioned military base Fort Baker is a heck of a place to hike, as is nearby Mt. Tamalpais (don’t even try to pronounce it — just say Mt. Tam and go about your business). Ask for maps at the Sausalito Visitor’s Center.
Kayaking
One of the best ways to explore the deep end of Sausalito is with the Sea Trek Ocean Kayaking Center (tel 415-488-1000; ww.seatrekkayak.com; Schoonmaker Point Marina; S/D kayak rental $15/$25 per hour). Make like a harbor seal and paddle amongst the houseboats, out to Angel Island or under the Golden Gate Bridge.
July 14, 2006
Lodging: Dog Bark Park Inn
So let me ask you a personal question: have you ever wanted to sleep inside of a dog? Because it can be arranged.
The Dog Bark Park Inn in Cottonwood, Idaho, invites you to “Come stay in the World’s Largest Beagle!” Huzzah!
The address is listed only as “Highway 95″ and I guess that makes sense: you just drive till you see a great big dog, then you pretty much know you’ve arrived. No need to double check the mailbox.
Here’s how the website describes the mechanics of entering the dog, straight from the Beagle’s mouth:
“Guests enter the body of the beagle from a private spacious 2nd story deck. Inside and up another level in the head of the dog are a loft room for additional sleeping accommodations and a cozy reading nook in the dog’s muzzle.”
I mean, really, how many hotels can boast a reading nook in a dog’s muzzle?
Just thought this would be good info for all of you who have written to complain that there are just no good places to stay when you’re visiting Greater Cottonwood.
P.S. The Dog Bark Park also has a gift shop and artists’ studio, “featuring the whimsical chainsaw artwork of husband/wife artists Dennis and Frances.” The duo specializes in — you guessed it: Dogs! You can buy Beagles, Golden Retrievers, Basset Hounds and more, all delicately carved out of wood with a chainsaw. You can also find some generic cats in case you’re not all that into dogs — but then, why would you be staying here if you weren’t?
Know another weird place to spend the night? Inside a kitty, perhaps? Leave your suggestion in the comments section!
July 10, 2006
Drinking and Diving in Austin, Texas
Many people arrive in Austin for the first time with vague instructions that “all the bars are on Sixth Street.” But while Sixth Street provides one-stop-shopping for aspiring drunks, true aficionados will turn to the back streets, the dark alleys, the seedy strip malls, for that singular joy that is the dive bar. These are the places where the décor is tacky, the beer is cheap and the patrons are … interesting. Ready to to take the plunge into Austin’s unique dive-iosity? Here are the best places to start:
Buddy’s
8619 Burnet Rd – (512) 459-4677
We love Buddy’s laid-back vibe, their jukebox, their cardboard cutouts of Budweiser girls, their tiny dance floor, and most of all, their shuffleboard game in the back room.
Carousel Lounge
1110 E 52nd Street – (512) 452-6790
Who wouldn’t love a dive bar with a circus theme that’s located behind a liquor store? Since they only serve beer, they’ll let you BYOB — all the better to enjoy their rockin’ live music.
Ginny’s Little Longhorn
5434 Burnet Rd – (512) 458-1813
Ginny herself can be found slinging beers most nights at this friendly, lively bar that has a jukebox full of classic country and a crowd of regulars that knows all the words.
Horseshoe Lounge
2034 S Lamar Blvd – 2034 S Lamar Blvd
With disco lights and a bar shaped like a horseshoe, this smoky joint has aspiring hipsters rubbing shoulders with blue-collar workers for a scene that’s a little self-conscious at times, but fun nonetheless.
La-La’s Little Nugget
2207 Justin Lane – (512) 453-2521
It’s always Christmas at La-La’s — that is to say that the decorations stay up all year long. And it’s in a strip mall, so extra points for that. However, it is one of the smokiest bars in which you’ll ever have the joy of coughing up a lung.
Did I leave out one of your favorites? Tell me your dive bar of choice in the comments section!
July 7, 2006
Sausalito Hotel: Casa Madrona
Casa Madrona has an identity crisis; it’s really three hotels in one. First, there’s the original hotel, a creaky Victorian mansion dating back to 1885. Rooms come in a mishmash of styles and may or may not have a fireplace, a kitchen or a ghost. (Romantic or creepy — you decide!)
Next are the sixteen cottages that were added in the 1970s. Decorated in different themes, they range from an artist’s loft to the color pink — which isn’t really a theme so much as a color, but try telling them that.
Then there’s the recently-added and very photogenic luxury hotel they parade around in their promotional materials. It’s gorgeous, it’s modern, and it used to be a parking garage. Wait, what? Yeah, the newest wing in the hotel started out as a parking garage, then was a shopping center, then was renovated to its current state. The odd, ramp-like stairs leading into the lobby give away its less-than-luxe past.
Many people are disappointed when their room in the old mansion doesn’t match the spiffy photos online. Luckily, the staff seems okay with letting you shop around: you wouldn’t be the first person to ask to change rooms.
801 Bridgeway
Sausalito, CA 94965
Toll Free (800) 288-0502
Tel (415) 332-0502
July 5, 2006
Overheard: Patriotic Travel Suggestion
Girl: “I love watching fireworks.”
Guy: “You should go to Iraq.”
June 30, 2006
Monkeys at Home and Abroad
Suddenly monkeys are everywhere.
It started when I was enjoying a salad and reading a book called There’s No Toilet Paper… on the Road Less Travelled: The Best of Travel Humor and Misadventure. I came across a piece by Nigel Barley called “A Simian in the Cinema” that made me laugh till I just about snorted bean sprouts out my nose.
It’s an excerpt from his book Ceremony: An Anthropologist’s Misadventures in the African Bush, and it describes a monkey on furlough from the zoo who grows clingy after Barley saves it from being hit over the head with a rock — and who ends up tagging along to the movies:
“Life is full of those actions that seem perfectly reasonable at the time. The logic of a situation is purely a local thing. Many actions, when looked back upon, seem bizarre and inexplicable. ‘Why don’t we just take him along?’ suggested Bob. At that particular moment nothing seemed more natural than that I should take the snoring simian along to the cinema with me.”
Two days later, I was reading Perceptive Travel when I came across a great story by Rolf Potts, whose story Tantric Sex for Dilettantes was selected for the next edition of Best American Travel Writing. This story also involves a monkey, although it’s not the main focus of the story (see title).
Finally, more than one person has mentioned that Penn Jillette’s radio show has a special theme called Monkey Tuesday, where listeners call in and share monkey stories. While they’re not specifically travel-related, many of them end up taking place on a vacation of some sort — as few people end up running across monkeys in their everyday lives.
Let’s face it. Monkeys are funny.
Got a monkey story of your own? Do share! That’s what the comments section is for!
June 26, 2006
San Francisco: Fortune Cookie Factory
This is an excerpt from my article, “Cracking the Cookie: Finding Fortune in San Francisco.” A friend of mine happened to mention that she was planning on entertaining her whole family next weekend by taking them on the fortune cookie factory tour, so I sent her this info, which I will now share with you:
If you go for the factory tour, don’t expect an actual tour. Expect to find the intoxicating smell of vanilla, perhaps, and definitely expect to taste the freshest fortune cookie you’ve ever tasted. But the entire factory tour consists of walking about five steps in the front door, flanked by shelves of fortune cookies on either side, after which you might stand awkwardly and watch the women at work at their machines.
A machine squirts batter onto a small round griddle, forming perfect little round pancakes. Slightly flawed ones get tossed in a bucket while the perfect ones will go on to impart destiny. The process take about five seconds, and it goes something like this: pick up the fortune, pick up the pancake, put the fortune into the pancake, fold it in half, then bend it over a little metal rod.
After a minute or so, someone will ask you if you’d like a taste of fresh fortune cookie, and you’ll be offered some of the unfolded rejects from the bucket on the floor. Do not hesitate; they’re divine (and, with any luck, still warm). Then you will be given the opportunity to purchase a bag of fortune cookies, since it is, sadly, the end of your “tour.”
DETAILS:
Golden Gate Fortune Cookie Factory
56 Ross Alley, San Francisco. Hours: 9:00 am – midnight. Admission is free.
